Intimacy: Trusting Oneself and the Other (Osho Insights for a New Way of Living)


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He lives in utter silence twenty-four hours—no ripples on the lake of his consciousness, no thoughts, no dreams. But a Sigmund Freud is afraid because he knows what he is dreaming. I have heard about an incident.

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Three great Russian novelists— Chekhov, Gorky, and Tolstoy—were just sitting on a bench in a park and gossiping; they were great friends. All were geniuses, all created such great novels that even today, if you want to count ten great novels of the world, at least five will be from the Russian novelists before the revolution.

Chekhov was telling about the women in his life, Gorky joined in, he also said a few things. But Tolstoy remained silent. Tolstoy was a very orthodox, religious Christian. You will be surprised to know that Mahatma Gandhi in India has accepted three persons as his masters, and one was Tolstoy. And he must have been repressing so much. He was one of the richest men in Russia—he was a member of the nobility—but he lived like a poor beggar because "blessed are the poor and they shall inherit the kingdom of God," and he was not willing to give up the kingdom of God.

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This is not simplicity, and it is not desirelessness—it is too much desire. It is too much greed. It is too much instinct for power. He is sacrificing this life and its joys because it is a small life, and for eternity he will enjoy paradise and the kingdom of God. It is a good bargain—almost like a lottery but certain. Tolstoy was living a very celibate life, eating only vegetarian food.

Naturally his dreams must have been very ugly, his thoughts must have been very ugly. And when Chekhov and Gorky asked him, "Tolstoy, why are you silent? Say something!


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I will say something only when one foot is in the grave. I will say it, and then jump into the grave. Now, you cannot be very intimate with a man like Tolstoy.

Intimacy simply means that the doors of the heart are open for you; you are welcome to come in and be a guest. But that is possible only if you have a heart that is not stinking with repressed sexuality, that is not boiling with all kinds of perversions, a heart that is natural. As natural as trees, as innocent as children—then there is no fear of intimacy. That's what I am trying to do: to help you unburden your unconscious, unburden your mind, to become ordinary. There is nothing more beautiful than to be just simple and ordinary.

Then you can have as many intimate friends, as many intimate relationships, as possible because you are not afraid of anything. You become an open book that anybody can read. There is nothing to hide. Every year, a hunting club went up into the Montana hills. The members drew straws to decide who would handle the cooking and also agreed that anyone complaining about the food would automatically replace the unlucky cook. Realizing after a few days that no one was likely to risk speaking up, Sanderson decided on a desperate plan. He found some moose droppings and added two handfuls to the stew that night.

There were grimaces around the campfire after the first few mouthfuls, but nobody said anything. Then one xv Foreword member suddenly broke the silence.

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Intimacy: Trusting Oneself and the Other (Osho Insights for a New Way of Living)

Inside, you think one thing; outside, you express something else. You are not one organic whole. Relax and destroy the split that society has created in you. Say only that which you mean. Act according to your own spontaneity, never bothering about consequences. It is a small life, and it should not be spoiled in thinking about consequences here and hereafter. One should live totally, intensely, joyously and just like an open book, available for anybody to read it.

Of course you will not make a name in the history books. But what is the point in making a name in the history books? Live, rather than think of being remembered. You will be dead. Millions of people have lived on the earth, and we don't know even their names. Accept that simple fact—you are here for only a few days and then you will be gone. These few days are not to be wasted in hypocrisy, in fear. These days have to be rejoiced. Nobody knows anything about the future. Your heaven and your hell and your God are most probably all hypotheses, unproved.


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The only thing that is in your hands is your life—make it as rich as possible. By intimacy, by love, by opening yourself to many people, you become richer. And if you can live in deep love, in deep friendship, in deep intimacy, with many people, you have lived rightly. And xvi Foreword wherever you happen to be, you have learned the art, and you will be living happily there, too. If you are simple, loving, open, intimate, you create a paradise around you.

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If you are closed, constantly on the defensive, always worried that somebody may come to know your thoughts, your dreams, your perversions, you are living in hell. Hell is within you—and so is paradise. They are not geographical places, they are your spiritual spaces. Cleanse yourself. And meditation is nothing but a cleaning of all the rubbish that has gathered in your mind.

When the mind is silent and the heart is singing, you will be ready—without any fear but with great joy—to be intimate. And without intimacy, you are alone here among strangers. With intimacy, you are surrounded by friends, by people who love you. Intimacy is a great experience.

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One should not miss it. But the deeper search, and the more basic search, is how to get rooted in existence again. Call it meditation, call it prayer, or whatever you will, but the essential thing is how to get rooted in existence again. We have become trees that are uprooted—and nobody else is responsible except us, with our own stupid idea of conquering nature. We are part of nature—how can the part conquer the whole? Befriend it, love it, trust it, and slowly, slowly in that friendship, in that love, in that trust, intimacy arises; you come closer. Nature comes closer to you, and nature starts revealing its secrets.


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Its ultimate secret is godliness. It is revealed only to those who are really friends of existence.

Intimacy: Trusting Oneself and the Other (Osho Insights for a New Way of Living) Intimacy: Trusting Oneself and the Other (Osho Insights for a New Way of Living)
Intimacy: Trusting Oneself and the Other (Osho Insights for a New Way of Living) Intimacy: Trusting Oneself and the Other (Osho Insights for a New Way of Living)
Intimacy: Trusting Oneself and the Other (Osho Insights for a New Way of Living) Intimacy: Trusting Oneself and the Other (Osho Insights for a New Way of Living)
Intimacy: Trusting Oneself and the Other (Osho Insights for a New Way of Living) Intimacy: Trusting Oneself and the Other (Osho Insights for a New Way of Living)
Intimacy: Trusting Oneself and the Other (Osho Insights for a New Way of Living) Intimacy: Trusting Oneself and the Other (Osho Insights for a New Way of Living)

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